Men are like a fine wine. They start out as grapes and
the women stomp the shit out of them until they turn into
something acceptable to have dinner with!
A girl returned home from a party and told her mother a young man had
kissed her. "How many times did he kiss you?" asked her mother.
Looking up into his face, the girl replied: Mother, I came to confess, not to
Women won't play football not because they are not good at it;
But because it's against their ego to be dressed up exactly like 10 other
women in front of 10,000 people!
Boy: Mom, please give me a glass of water.
Mom: You come and drink it yourself.
Boy: Please Mom...
Mom: If you repeat, I'll slap you.
Boy: When you come to slap me, bring water for me!
A pregnant lady went to an astrologer.
Astrologer: When you deliver a baby, baby's father will die.
Lady: Thank God, my husband is safe!
Nothing is old, nothing is new..
It just a matter of point of view..
Enjoy life as happy days r few..
Coz if life is an ocean then happy moments r like dew
Officer: Soldier, do you have change for 1000 rupees?
Soldier: Sure, buddy.
Officer: That's no way to address an officer! Now let's try it again.
Officer: Do you have change for a 100 rupees?
Soldier: No, SIR!
Attitude of girls:
When a boy sends dirty 'SMS';
She laughs for 10 minutes;
Forwards that to her friends;
And then replies the boy.
Mind it, I don't like that kind of 'SMS'?
A woman is the most beautiful creation of God. She starts compromising
from a very tender age. She sacrifices her chocolates for her brother. Later,
she sacrifices her love for just a smile on her parents' face.
As a result, she avenges it after she gets married by venting all her anger and
directing her ire against her hubby!